Whether it is your idea that is rejected, or you as a person that feels excluded – rejection is never an easy thing. Yet it is part of life. Here are 5 tips to help you positively deal with rejection.
1. Acknowledge your emotions
Fighting emotions never helps. Emotions want to be heard. The more you fight them, the more they’ll come back. By contrast, the more you acknowledge them, the more they tend to go away. It might be counterintuitive, but once you allow yourself to feel the pain or the frustration, the intensity of the discomfort typically diminishes.
2. Talk to somebody
Many of us have learned to appear solid, and to act strong. Talking about our problems with others feels ‘dangerous’, as we fear it would make us look ‘weak’ and it would alienate us from the person we spoke to. Reality is, talking about doubts or frustrations to a trustworthy person helps tremendously and often enhances the depth of the relationship. Have a good, deep discussion, and then make sure to smile and laugh again together.
3.Realize this doesn’t define you
When others turn us down, many of us make it very personal. The rejection of our idea or of our presence feels like a rejection of our identity. We start wondering what’s wrong with us, and, if we don’t pay attention, we become convinced that we are flawed. That never helps. Stop asking yourself the question ‘what’s wrong with me’. The rejection might not be due to you but to elements you’re not even aware of…
4. Find out who or what might have contributed
There are often many reasons why something went wrong. Maybe, for whatever reason, you haven’t been living up to your own standards. But perhaps circumstances have been very harsh too, leading to a suboptimal scenario. It could be as well that the other party has contributed to the problem.
5. Reflect on how to move on
Avoid dwelling on the situation, make sure you don’t stay in the negativity. The best thing you can do to move on, is to paint a vivid picture of a possible nice future. Envision a couple of small things you could create in the near future and that would give you a boost. Or reflect on a big, motivating project that you really want to accomplish. Something that excites you.
Apply these 5 tips, and the rejection will feel much less painful.
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